Author Norman Vincent Peale once said “Believe in yourself! Have faith in your abilities! Without a humble but reasonable confidence in your own powers you cannot be successful or happy”.
Sadly in today’s day many people have such low confidence that they are constantly putting themselves down. They are not happy and have no faith in their abilities. And with no confidence they don’t meet new people st all. And when they begin to examine their lives the only thing they can see is a completely dull life with no new buddies to hang out with and maybe even never progress in their job/career because they can’t network at all. But why do people feel this?
According to Overcoming.co.uk-Crucial experiences that help to form our beliefs about ourselves often (although not always) occur early in life. What you saw, heard and experienced in childhood – in your family, in the wider community and at school – will have influenced the way you see yourself. Examples of early experiences that could lead to your thinking badly of yourself and have low confidence include:
- systematic punishment, neglect or abuse
- failing to meet parental standards
- failing to meet peer-group standards
- being on the receiving end of other people’s stress or distress.
- belonging to a family or social group that other people are prejudiced towards
- an absence of praise, warmth, affection or interest
- being the odd one out, at home or at school.
So now we know the reason why people just don’t have confidence at all, what is Confidence? Confidence is is knowing what you’re good at, the value you provide, and acting in a way that conveys that to others. But most importantly:
1) Confidence Early In Life Can Mean Upwards Mobility at Work
2) Confidence Can Be More Important Romantically Than Physical Attractiveness
So What Do I have To Do To Successfully Gain Confidence?
Be Around Confident People
This is the first thing that shy folks or people who just want to keep growing their confidence should definitely do. It’s very crucial. For example before a surgery the doctors must apply anesthesia so that the patient wont feel any pain during the procedure. If they do not add the anesthesia the patient will go crazy in pain and the surgery will get complicated. So when it comes to gaining confidence you have to be around those who are confident in what they do. But why? Because little by little that will begin to rub off on you. If you just put yourself in situations where your surrounded by shyness its going to affect you big time! Dont make this mistake! But what does a confident person do?
- Have positive yet ‘realistic’ expectations.
- Have faith in their own abilities.
- Are comfortable with uncertainty.
- Know they can handle failure if it happens.
- Believe they can cope; not necessarily succeed – there’s a difference!
- Don’t feel they have to conform in order to be accepted.
- Are willing to risk the disapproval of others because they trust their own judgement.
- Don’t need the approval of others, hence they can tolerate failure.
- Can see the funny side of things, even personal mistakes and misfortunes.
- Don’t take things too seriously or personally.
- Feel good about themselves.
- Make others feel good about themselves.
Psych Yourself Up 1000 %
What do I mean by psyching up yourself 1000%? All I’m saying is that you want to increase your inner power to the maximum. And a great way to psych yourself up in any situation is by doing a visualization technique. You can try this exercise at home, the couch, at work, at your next party or even networking event and the best part is that it only takes a minute. This can also be found in “The Charisma Myth” by Olivia Fox Cabane.
1. Close your eyes and relax.
2. Remember a past experience when you felt absolutely triumphant.
3. Experience all the amazing feelings you received and the confidence will begin to arise.
Just by doing this simple mental workout many people begin to feel good about themselves but how about the others who barely feel slightly better or nothing at all? Well, remember that this is a skill that must be practiced so the more times you put yourself in this mental state the more vivid your images will be and psyching yourself up will extremely easy.
What are the other secrets into Gaining Confidence Today?
To Be Continued……………….
Categories: Secrets to conversation